Headline Headline News

Monster truck show radio ad eerily reminiscent of 1996 funny car spot.

Rich Lather — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 21:27:24 +0000

Mall conglomerate plans ahead for inevitable return of Jonas Brothers concerts.

Rich Lather — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 21:25:16 +0000

Makers of Ritalin hope new ad campaign focuses on efficacy. And balloons. And cats. And marbles. And chicken fingers.

Rich Lather — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 21:24:21 +0000

Senatorial Misconduct

Rich Lather — Thu, 12 Aug 2010 15:20:37 +0000

Apple denies iPad 50% more absorbent than wings.

Rich Lather — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 21:00:30 +0000

“No signs of leak” says BP official monitoring his dog.

Rich Lather — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 20:56:30 +0000

Report: Consumer sentiment sinks lower than new MYV reality show.

Rich Lather — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 20:55:54 +0000

Jersey shore engineer believes his fist pumping method may clear up Gulf spill.

Rich Lather — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 16:06:05 +0000

Consumer confidence plummets after Annie Sez breaks thing off.

Rich Lather — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 15:52:24 +0000

Bob Seger tells Chevy he’s got plenty of other songs to kill, too.

Rich Lather — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 15:11:00 +0000

Jacoby & Meyers takes a pass at representing Lohan.

Rich Lather — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 15:08:57 +0000

Military tribunal: Those who say “adverts” not protected under international torture laws.

Rich Lather — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 14:55:44 +0000

Torre absentmindedly picks his nose in remembrance of Steinbrenner.

Rich Lather — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 14:53:13 +0000

Now that the Cup is over, many South Africans welcome a return to lawlessness and terror.

Rich Lather — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 14:29:03 +0000

MLB Network confirms Costas being treated for advanced hyperbole.

Rich Lather — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 14:26:05 +0000

USA Gymnastics strongly against proposed flat tax.

Rich Lather — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 18:16:31 +0000

CDC: 2 in 5 U.S. inner city children range from mildly obese to Fat Albert.

Rich Lather — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 18:13:24 +0000

Stamos underage sex trial reaches critical mullet phase.

Rich Lather — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 16:30:31 +0000

Agoraphobics continue to oppose socialized medicine.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 17:30:12 +0000

After tearing calf muscle mid-show, Bon Jovi unfortunately continues on.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 17:03:33 +0000

Pared down Lillith Fair to hold next concert at local 7-11 parking lot.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 16:46:49 +0000

Former road manager of Asia skeptical of Miami Heat’s chances.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 15:05:05 +0000

Former Red denies using corked bat in 90′s. Claim it was Schott that used him.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 14:03:09 +0000

German scientist says carbon emission shouldn’t exceed 99 luft baloons.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 13:55:02 +0000

88% of American sports fans ready to publicly trash soccer again.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 13:19:12 +0000

Puported cellmate preparing proper response to Lohan’s fingernail message.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 13:16:45 +0000

Privately, Greenspan believes 2010 depression caused by Andrea Mitchell’s nagging.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 13:11:30 +0000

Nielsen confirms: Mindless dreck outpacing self absorbed pap in summer ratings battle.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 13:10:01 +0000

Feeling neglected, Inuits demand Gibson slur them next.

Rich Lather — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 13:09:31 +0000

National Erma Bombeck convention to meet in back of Toyota Sienna Minivan.

Rich Lather — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 23:16:34 +0000

Despite the sluggish economy and high unemployment, Erma Bombeck devotees will hold their annual convention this summer. Fans will meet somewhere near Bombeck’s birthplace of Bellbrook, OH in the back of organizer Lillian Mulvey’s 2006 auburn Sienna Minivan. Mulvey hopes this year’s turnout will be bigger than the 2007 event held in her 1987 Ford Festiva.

J&J recalls Tylenol PM, trip to Amish country.

Rich Lather — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 23:04:30 +0000

Johnson & Johnson announced they would not only recall 21 OTC medications in the next week, but the trip they took to Lancaster County in southeast Pennsylvania some 17 years ago. According to J&J customers and the teenage children they had to bribe with a day trip to Hershey Park just to go along, both the medications and Amish had a “musty, moldy odor” that couldn’t be explained.

Russian Spy Swap

Rich Lather — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 22:52:09 +0000

Add your headline here.

Hurricane Alex makes parts of southern Texas look like northern Mexico.

Rich Lather — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 22:45:51 +0000

With gale force winds, high tides and torrential rains, Hurricane Alex ripped through pockets of the Galveston gulf, turning sleepy beach front communities into shanty-looking barrios. The devastation was so complete, a number of purported illegals ran back to Mexico thinking they just got a little mixed up on the way in.

Mets: Santana to miss next start due to stiffness in penis.

admin — Wed, 23 Jun 2010 01:19:48 +0000

Not wanting to take any chances so close to the All Star break, Mets manager Jerry Manuel will be pushing back Johan Santana’s next start due to increasing stiffness in his penis. “Thankfully, his scrotum and testicles appear to be pain free”, remarked Manuel, who doesn’t expect any long term erections in the future. It is believed Santana injured himself either warming up on a mound or at a member/guest best ball.

France decides to play, no one cares.

admin — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 21:25:24 +0000

France decides to play, no one cares.